Seeds of Compassion

In the past two weeks, I have been undergoing a tremendous emotional roller coaster. The whole city of Seattle is getting ready to celebrate a joyous festival of humanity, a 5-day gathering (organized by Seeds of Compassion) to share the vision of compassion with His Holiness Dalai Lama. Communities from different works of life and different religious faith are coming together for celebrations. People from all over the country are convening to share their visions, experiences and stories of the work of compassion. My friends and I are busy preparing for the upcoming events with excitement and anticipation…

On the other hand, I am greatly saddened by the growing hostilities towards Tibetans and His Holiness among my own countrymen. Before this current conflict arise, I thought that Chinese were just indifferent to Tibet issue but I had not imagined that the very people subjected to the suppression and manipulation of the government would choose not to excercise their judgement and discernment. These people include highly educated intellectuals and those receiving PhD degrees and living in US for decades …

I had several conversations with some of my Chinese co-workers. I realize that in today’s informational age, one pretty much can find “hard” evidences to back up whatever stories one chose to subscribe to. For example, two things are deeply ingrained in the minds of people from mainland China, due to decades of propaganda. One is “Tibet has always been part of China”. Second is “Dalai Lama is a liar”. Along these lines, they can find mountains of "convincing evidences" that further reinforce their beliefs. These two notions were so deeply planted into people’s consciousness that they grew deep roots in their subconsciousness and these roots were tied in with their emotions. Therefore, when I tried to present evidences from the opposite sides, it is no longer an objective discussion, my opposition presented as a serious emotional threat to them. The fact that these opposition came from a Chinese offended them even more.

I also realize that years of suppression have deposited tons of negative emotions in people’s subconsciousness. I saw so much fear, anger and frustration. These emotions are not evident in normal daily life. In fact, people are not aware of these subconscious emotions themselves. Situations like this have created an outlet for them to express these negative emotions.

However, I can feel everything they feel, because I had been one of them. If this conflict had happened 10 years ago, I would have reacted the same way as they did. I probably would have gone to the street and joined the pro-government protest, all the while feeling proud of my patriotic action. That was because 10 years ago, I lived in the confinement of walls that I wasn’t aware of. Luckily, the divine force of life has led me out of the prison and showed me love and faith right in face.

A Chinese recently asked me, what would happen if I found out Dalai Lama was lying . I told her that I believed in Dalai Lama not because he is Dalai Lama, but because everything he had said and done was in line with love and compassion, which was my true faith. Whether someone lies or not has nothing to do with my faith. She didn’t understand that faith coming from one’s own heart did not need any outside proofs. To believe in my faith, I do not need photos from any news agency nor do I need articles written by historians or experts. The people who have touched my heart and soul are my proof. My loving friends and their precious friendships are my proof. The spiritual awakening I experienced on the pilgrimage in Tibet is my proof. The transforming force that has shaped my life and brought me joys beyond my imagination was my proof. My own life is my proof.

At the eve of the Seeds of Compassion festival, I felt deeply saddened that most of my fellow countrymen in Seattle choose not to be part of this feast of joy. Compassion is the most precious gift of life. Nothing is more saddening when people choose not to receive it. Life without compassion is life without sunshine. However, at the end of night, a new day is bound to come. And this new day will only be dawning when we consciously choose to act out of compassion and love in every single moment, even in the face of confrontation, even in the face of hatred, even in the face of animosity, even in this moment!

I pray to the divine forces, please give me infinite capacity for compassion. Please give me strength and endurance to face anything that hurts or makes me squint. No matter what has happened, please never let me lose my compassion and faith.